God Provides!

Wow! What an amazing past two weeks I have had...really just the end of this past week, specifically Friday. However, during the past two weeks I have been really at peace with my life. Even though in the past two weeks I never had any sub jobs. I would check online at night, I would wake up early (not on purpose) to check online in the AM and nothing. I would end up waking up at 9AM or later and realize that the sub system had not called me for that day. I would always be happy, but at the same time frustrated because I need the money and I would ask God, "What in the heck, why am I not working today, you know I need the money!" But then after that throughout the day I would just thank God for the time to get things done that I have been needing to catch up on etc.

So just this past week I was telling a friend on Thursday night that my week has been great and that I had been soooooo peaceful and not understanding it. Obviously this is the peace that passes all understanding that the Lord had put in me. I was thinking to myself, "I should be frustrated, I should be sad, worried, whatever because I am not making extra money since I haven't had any sub jobs" but the peace just continued and I wasn't any of those things I listed above. Okay, frustrated at times, absolutely, but the peace came just as quick as lightning. It wasn't until Sunday when I was talking with a friend that I realized why I was having this great sense of peace!! Here is the story leading up to Sunday:

I have been praying for God to provide and putting all of my trust in faith in Him more in the past few weeks than ever before. There was nothing left that I could do that would help the situation but to put all my faith and trust in God. So that is what I did. When i started nannying, I knew eventually that I would nanny full-time because Janelle, the mom, was looking for a full-time job, it was just a matter of time. I was praying for her job situation as well as my own situation, knowing that God would provide for both of us. God did amazing things in the past 3 weeks. 3 weeks ago Janelle had a phone interview, the following week a face-to-face interview, and then she had to present to the interviewers. Man, what a process. She presented this past Thursday and got a call Friday saying she got the job. She came home so excited and told me about it and that she starts her new job Friday the 20th, which means that is when I start nannying full-time. Monday the 23rd starts my first full week! I was soooooo pumped to hear that. No more waiting in the AM's for the sub system to call anymore (that was only two days a week, but still).

Oh but wait, it gets better...so I have been struggling financially and have been very open with Janelle about this and as we are talking about her new job she asked me if I wanted to move in with them. I was shocked, but of course sooooo excited! I told her I would think about it and pray about it but of course I was too excited and knew right away that this was totally a God thing that he is providing a less expensive place for me to live! Wow! God totally blew me away this weekend! I couldn't stop thinking about it all weekend, I am so pumped about this and not sure if I have been this excited about anything in a super long time!!! So, in 30 days I will become a "live-in nanny"!!! I CANNOT WAIT! I even have my own private entrance through the garage and the whole basement with a private bedroom/full bathroom, and kichenette with a refrigerator and sink. This is more than I could have ever imagined. Just like it is written in Ephesians 3:20!

Below are pictures of the two older girls, Claire is in the top picture, she is 7 and in 1st grade. Ella is below that, she is 4 1/2.


So Sunday when I am talking to my friend we both realize that this peace is because God knew that all of this would happen on Friday and that I would be relieved from all the previous stress and worry. So He was preparing me for these exciting upcoming events!! :)

I am so blessed to have this opportunity with this amazing beautiful family! They are such fun people to be around, easy going, easy to talk to, and I am so excited to be a part of their family!

Below are pictures of the three girls before we left for the library one Friday and on the right is Avery, 16 mo on her "stage" dancing away!

Ella, Claire, Avery

Thank you Lord for bringing them into my life. If you are doubting that God will provide for your situation. Read through my testimony again or ask me more details and I will give you all the details. I have waited for many months for a big break through to happen and God has shown his goodness and favor to me and I am forever grateful.

Faith vs. Fear

My friend Alicia did a great talk on Thursday night at Immersion and I wanted to share the highlights and what God spoke to me through her talk and the many things he reminded me of.

God reminded me to continue to take risks. Take risks in all areas of life. Kids are not afraid to take risks, they are not afraid to walk on those "walls" or "curbs". They reach out and grab the hand of the adult walking near them. The adult is comfort to them and guides them along. I love how Alicia parallelled this to us as adults. We so often don't take risks because we are too busy, but more often because we are afraid. We are afraid to step up on those "walls". But, the great thing is like a parent who will guide a child and walk next to them while on the curb, God will hold our hand and walk next to us. When he calls us to step on the walls, He will walk with us through it.

Alicia also talked about 2 Timothy 1:7. It says, "God did not give us the spirit of fear but of power, love and self-control. This verse has been huge for me for many years! She reminded us that faith and fear cannot coexist. Fear is NOT from God! I am so thankful to be remnded about that because sometimes i live in so much fear there is no room for faith and then i miss out on things. Like with my financial struggles right now. I have so much fear from time to time that there is no room for me to have faith that God will provide like He promises. But God does promise so I need to rebuke that fear and believe and have faith. God gives us the power, love, and self-control. We need to focus on that when we are struggling instead of allowing the enemy to let us beleive the lies and fear he has installed in us. I am so thankful for these reminders. It is not easy in these storms but with God all things are possible.

Both of these things that Alicia talked about on Thursday night totally prepared me for Pastor Mike's sermon this week on Jesus calming the storm. Basically it's Faith vs. Fear. How much faith do we have? Do we have enough faith to get up on that curb and allow God to grab our hand and guide us through the storms we are going through? Think about that for yourself. Or...are you afraid? Well like 2 Timothy 1:7 says, "God did not give us the spirit of fear"...that is because fear is not from God. Faith and fear cannot live in the same place. They are like oil and water, they butt heads. So think of the areas of fear in your life right now and give them to God. Have faith that he promises to be with you through the storms and calm the storms. It doesn't mean he will calm the storms immediately but he will calm them. Ask God to show you why you are in this season of storms and what He wants you to learn from them.

I did this a couple nights ago. I prayed, "Show me Lord why I am in this season, but more importantly what lesson do you want me to learn from this." This is what I felt he was speaking to me:

"This is part of the slowing down, you can't do much without money. I am teaching you to be okay with being at home relaxing. I am teaching you how to say 'no' to things. I am teaching you how to be financially smart and not spend 'my' money foolishly."

WOW! some of those things aren't easy to hear. But I have been asking the Lord to show me for a long time how to say 'no' to things and slow down because I am always running, always filling my time and having to be busy. I have been asking Him to help me be more devoted to Him. With slowing down and making even just 5 minutes, which generally turns into at least ten, I get that time with him. The ten minutes is refreshing and a lot can get accomplished especially when done in the middle of the day when my kiddos that I nanny are at school or napping. It reenergizes me for the rest of the day and then I feel great. I continue to encourage all of my readers to just take a simple 5 minutes to stop, don't journal, don't do anything, but be, just be still in the presence of God. It's amazing what he can speak to you or what you start to pray about when you aren't consciously trying. Hope you all had a great weekend and that this encourages you for this new week to come!

So many blessings!

Where do I begin? Well, I have had so many blessings within the past week during some really tough and trying times. Financially I am struggling and I have been praying to God that he would provide for me. At times I am very positive thinking, "I totally trust that God has this under control even though it seems as though I am running completely out of money and won't be able to pay bills or that every dime I do make will go to bills." Then I have other days that are really bad and I think, "I can't even believe this, do I trust God? Is he really going to provide? I am not seeing any results!

During the past two weeks God has totally shown up!!! Days are still tough and I still have doubts every now and then but I know those doubts don't come from God so I try to put those behind me and just trust in God's word and truth.

In December God totally blessed me with an amazing family to nanny for. I started in the beginning of January. This amazing family has three beautiful young girls: 16 mo., 4 1/2, and 7. It is amazing to be with the kids and even to be able to just "be" a part of their family and talk with the mom when she gets home etc. That was the first blessing among the several that have just popped up this week. I only started with 2 days a week and now it is up to 3. God is so good like that. Eventually it will go full-time when the mom finds a full-time job so until then I will nanny for those 3 days, work starbucks at night and on the weekends and sub on my off days from nannying! This family has blessed me so much already!

On Thursday I went out with some friends after Immersion like I always do. I didn't want to bring up this tough financial situation because I figured only super close friends need to know about it but it came up anyway some how. I didn't go into a lot of detail. I was getting ready to leave and was digging in my person for something and see some money in my purse. It was a large amount and I couldn't even believe it. I was shocked. I was actually overwhelmed and wanted to thank whoever put it there. Then I realized that it basically came from God because He must have laid it on someone's heart to do that. But I was just shocked and so thankful that I have such amazing friends. I honestly couldn't even believe it. God knew I needed it and came through again for me.

Three days later I am at a bowling alley with some friends celebrating another friend's b-day. I am walking in the bowling alley and look down and see this wadded up $10 bill. I looked at it in disbelief that it was actually right there in front of me and I think I even thought it was just a buck at first (maybe in denial...who knows haha). So I picked it up, put it in my pocket, and went to ask two of my friends if they thought I should turn it in to see if anyone claims it. I wasn't sure how that would really work. Anyway, I told my friends that I felt like God said, "Pick it up, it's for you." Totally cool!!! Again, I couldn't even believe it!

So the last thing that was totally a blessing to me happened today! I went to get my oil changed with the full expectations of paying for it (obviously). But I had remembered at one point them telling me that my first two oil changes were free since this was a brand new car. But when I called and asked the lady how much the second oil change was she didn't even hesitate and told me the amount. She didn't ask what kind of car or anything. So I get to Toyota today and am waiting for the guy to come up to the window. He comes up and asks me if I want my tires rotated too. I asked how much and he said $20. I said, well, I only have 10,000 miles on my car so probably not today. He said, "Oh, this is an '08 isn't it?" I said, "Yes." He said, "Well, your oil change and tire rotation are free because it's your second one." I was shocked. I was soooooo excited!!! I had been putting off the oil change because it cost money but knew I needed to get it done soon and didn't want to wait any longer. Today was the only day I had time this week.

God is good! I am so blessed for these events that have occurred over the past month, but more specifically in the past week. God does provide! He will answer your prayers! Just keep putting your trust in Him and taking time to listen and talk to Him. That is what he is longing for from you! I pray that God blesses each and everyone one of you today, this month and all year! Keep your faith and hope in Him!!! Thank you Lord for these blessings.

5 minutes

Wow! I started this blog in September, wrote through the end of October and finally back on. It's been a crazy journey during these past few months...too many things to update on so....I am going to update you on my latest discovery!

5 minutes is all it takes to slow yourself down. At least for me that's all it has taken. I was talking with my accountability partner on Sunday night and trying to figure out how I can be more faithful with reading the Bible and have intentional time with God. As we discussed this we came to the conclusion that I have too many expectations of what I want my "intentional time with God" to look like. Therefore, each week that I don't do what I wanted to get done, I get disappointed with myself because I don't accomplish it. We continued to discuss this and she ended up suggesting that I just sit for 5 minutes and do nothing. I responded like this: "Do nothing for 5 minutes, yeah right, I can't sit for 5 minutes and do nothing." She said, "Well how about start with 3 then." I said, "No, I can do 5." I think that was her point exactly. Another thing I have been struggling with is just slowing down and being too busy, always filling my time with something. I don't know if I think that makes me feel important or what, but it was making me tired and unproductive.

Soooooo, this week I set a goal of sitting for 5 minutes literally doing nothing. I started the minute I got off the phone with my accountability partner. I was pumped for this week to start and to try this. I had faith in myself. I believed that I could do it and that it was an attainable goal. So, I was sitting on my bed, looking at the amazing painting of Jesus (named freedom) that hangs on my wall at the foot of my bed, painted by Bill Butler. I turned my phone over after looking at the starting time so I wouldn't be tempted to constantly look at it throughout this small amount of time of 5 minutes. I closed my eyes and wasn't thinking about much. It was so peaceful and calm. I totally felt the Lord saying to me, "You are free." Funny how that painting is called freedom (but at the time i didn't even think about that, it wasn't until i was journaling later that night that I had remembered that). And...the 5 minutes actually turned into 8 by the time I felt ready to look at my clock. WOW I thought, that was way easier than i thought. I could have even stayed sitting there so much longer.

I have continued this 5 minutes throughout the week and consistently it has turned into 7 or 8 minutes and even 10 minutes one day. This is amazing to me that I can sit and do nothing when I have always been someone who needs to/wants to be busy, for what reason you may ask, i have no clue. But i wish someone would have given me this strategy sooner. But I guess God knew when I needed it and this was definately the week for that!

I know that God commands us to "Be Still and know that He is God" but for some reason, I never knew how to "be still". I mean of course at times I did but more often than not I would run from one activity to the next.

This "5 minutes" has taught me many things. It has taught me to have less expectations of myself, not want to be in a hurry to get things done, less rushing, and be on the run all the time or filling my empty time with activities. The cool thing about not filling my time with activities is that I had 3 hours this evening before I have to go to Immersion. I was thinking, what in the world am I going to do in those 3 hours. God told me to rest, to do nothing. I had thought about going to the Blitz, but is that really what I want to do or do I just want the free food and to fill my time? Of course I want to learn about what they are studying but my initial motives are probably not right AND I don't need to fill all my empty time.

This "5 minutes" has also given me lots of opportunities to rest this week, and I have taken them!!! This is an amazing concept to me. To some you may already know how to do this but for me it is a new concept. Okay, well not a "new" concept in the fact that I just learned that people actually take quiet time and just time to rest, but new in the fact of how to do it and of me actually doing it. I have actually been productive this week and not rushed. I am not overly stressed about things I should be stressed about and not feeling too bogged down with activities.

What an amazing concept...LOL It's all about a matter of slowing down the body and mind. It's about saying no and be okay being alone, having quiet time or just doing nothing and not feeling guilty for doing nothing or like you have to be doing something. It's amazing and has changed my life already and I hope you will look at your life and slow down and be still long enough to hear what God is trying to speak to you. I have several busy work weeks ahead of me and I definately feel like God is slowing me down, preparing me and teaching me how to rest now so in the midst of those busy times i know how to rest. I pray that you take some time this week to rest as well and not be so busy in this world that tells us being busy is what makes us successful!

Faith

Wow, it’s been a while since I have written…so much has happened and so many topics I could write about but faith is the one that God is teaching me about the most this week.

Faith…such a big topic…it goes hand in hand with trust. We just talked bout faith on Sunday night with my freshman girls at Ignition and it reminded me of how important having faith is. There are several good verses that go right along with this topic.

Hebrews 11:1 – “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:6 – “And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.”

To me these are two very powerful verses. It is hard to know what faith is and to even have faith when it is based on something we cannot see right now. For example, right now I do not have a job that pays even half my bills. I had some money from unemployment saved up but that money is slowly dwindling. I am starting to worry about how I am going to pay my bills, pay for gas, groceries, get baby gifts, Christmas gifts, b-day presents etc. in the upcoming months. This world is so consumed with things and money that it is hard to live if you don’t have money. It is also hard to live in t his world if you don’t have faith. Because if you don’t have money and don’t have faith than what do you have to hope for. If you have faith, than you can pray and hope for God to provide you with what you need.

So this brings me back to the topic for today…I must have faith in my god that he will provide and keep his promises like he said he will. I have to trusts that these things will happen. If I don’t have faith, why would he reward me with the things that I need. I do not understand how people live in this broken, messed up economy of the world without God. God created us; he created the world and everything in it. Why wouldn’t you put your faith and trust in Him. That is the one thing t hat baffles me more than anything.

Matthew 17:21 – “If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

At ignition this week we discussed the story of Abraham and Sarah and how God came to her and said they would have a baby in a year. Sarah laughed at what God had told them. Abraham was an old dude, almost 100 and Sarah was pretty old too, but a year went past and Sarah and Abraham had a baby named Isaac (which means laughter). Gen. 18:1-15, 21:1-7

Sarah laughed in disbelief, thinking, they are too old to have kids, they've prayed about this for a long time, why now. They had little faith...can God do the impossible? Absolutely! He kept his promise and Sarah had that baby a year later! This story spoke to me on Sunday night and to my girls and it made us realize that with God nothing is impossible (Matt 19:26). It also made us realize that he longs for this daily relationship with us of trust and faith.

If I don’t have faith that God is going to provide for me, or faith that he has a perfect plan, that I will get a job etc. then my life will be impossible because then I will be living this life alone, on my own strength…and that would be stupidity on my part when I have a higher being, named God who is walking next to me every moment of my life, guiding me, showing me, speaking to me about the things he wants me to do and the things he has promised me. So I don’t know about you, but I am definitely putting my faith in God today and every day.

God, I thank you sooooo much that you sent your son to die on the cross for our sins. So that we can have eternal life and live according to YOUR plan not our own. Thank you God for protecting us, keeping your promises, and loving us even when we fall short and sin. Lord, I put all of my faith in you today because you are my God and Savior. I know that you will provide for me in this tough time in your timing. Lord, open my eyes to what you have planned for me next. Thank you Lord, I love you! AMEN!

Below is from the Spirit of Prophecy bulletin that I receive each day...this is today’s. This is so relevant to this topic of faith and trust. God promises that he will be our shelter and safe haven from destructive storms but challenges are going to come. God will help us get through these challenges if we put our faith and trust in him. Read below and soak on this for the week.

Beloved, this is a time when you must deliberately refocus your faith so that your dependence and trust are not in the things of the world, but in that which is eternal. You can trust Me when I tell you that I will be your shelter and safe haven from destructive storms. This does not mean that you will not be challenged through difficult circumstances, but it does mean that you can depend on Me to bring you through every situation in victory, says the Lord. Psalms 107:30 Then they are glad because they are quiet; so He guides them to their desired haven.

New Adventures in Des Moines

Well, the church in MN finally called me last Monday evening, a month and a day after my interview and said that they could not offer me a job but that I made it very tough for them to decide. I was relieved that they finally called me. I had planned to call them the very next day since I hadn't heard from them. I was not upset that I was not offered the job. I feel like that was totally the right thing and after praying about it and thinking about certain things over the past month, I realized that I may not have even taken the job if they had offered it to me a month later. I am so thankful that I know and that God placed it on my heart that I am supposed to stay in the DM area.

Later that evening (last Monday), after I had received that phone call I was checking my facebook and received a message from one of my freshman girls in my ignition small group. She basically told me how she was telling her mother that I am an amazing leader and can change the lives and tougch the lives of everyone in our small group. I about cried and was so excited...that is when I knew that a new season/adventure was going to start for me here in the DM area. I have so many things going on and I feel like this is the most important one that God has placed in front of me at the moment. I know he is going to use me to touch the lives of these freshman. I am sooooo excited for this challenge and adventure with them over the next year.

I just got done going to a soccer game of two of the girls and it brought so much joy to know that they wanted me there and were excited to see me afterwards. They did such a good job. They both scored goals today and they told me that this was the first game all season that they had scored goals. How cool is that?! Good for them. I am so excited to continue this journey with them.

God, I pray for each of my freshman girls. I pray that you be with them in school, give them self-control and help them resist temptation of this world. Give them your confidence and help them get along with their families as well. I pray Lord that you speak to me about their needs and that you give me the words you want me to speak to them and minister to them. Thank you Lord for this new adventure! :)

John 10':10

"The thief comes only to steal, kill, and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." John 10:10

Yesterday as I was working at Des Moines Christian subbing in a preschool room the kids were napping and a friend had given me this verse earlier in the day. I decided to study it and ponder it during nap time. Since this is a Christian school we are encouraged to read the Bible or devotionals during nap time, which is GREAT! I love feeling free to do that where I won't get looked at weird etc. Although, in this broken world it would make sense to read your Bible on break anyway to be a witness to those who don't believe.

So during this time of studying and pondering I asked the Lord to speak to me about this verse and this is what it means to me: The thief seems to be people who try to destroy your dreams. Who tries to stear you away from what you know God has called you to do. For me, God has called me into youth ministry and I have told many people this and many people (mostly my family) has encouraged me to pursue other things...and tellking me that there are many many options when I know that but also know that God has seriously called me into youth ministry so why would I waste my time looking at other things that I know I am not called into?

God has died and come back so we don't have to suffer like Jesus did and so that our sins are forgiven. that is what it means that we may have life because we are free because of those things that He did for us.

Those who aren't happy in their lives or are trying to feel accomplished through you will try to steal or destroy wha you are doing or what you could do. Everyday is a gift from God and it will be full if you allow God to enter in each moment of each day. :) Thank you God for giving us each day as a gift and symbol of your love.